Tip #1: Be Non-Judgmental and Respectful

One of the most powerful aspects of facilitation is suspending judgment on the part of the instructor. Refraining from shaming or blaming any individual or group of learners will almost always allow them to feel safe and to open their minds to critical self-examination. The Respectful Relationships Program offered to adults has demonstrated that, when discussing serious issues such as domestic abuse, it is critical to refrain from being judgmental. Abuse is a learned behavior that can be changed. In the pilot phase of the Respectful Futures program, instructors found that learners were equally able to examine topics such as bullying and anger more calmly and critically than when challenged.

Showing no judgment does not mean acceptance – it means that ideas are being collected and can be analyzed later. Even when students suggest something that is offensive, it is critical to remain curious and try to understand what is really going on. Almost always other students will open the door to other ideas and the facilitator can use the contradictions to examine the merits of the differing positions.